A chameleon does not leave one tree until he is sure of another.

"As melhores mulheres pertencem aos homens mais atrevidos... As mulheres sao como macas em arvores: as melhores estao no topo... Os homens nao querem alcancar essas boas, porque eles tem medo de cair e se magoar. Preferem apanhar as mais podres que ficam no chao, que nao sao boas como as do topo, mas sao faceis de se conseguir. Assim, as macas no topo pensam que algo esta errado com elas, quando na verdade, ELES estao errados... Elas tem que esperar um pouco para o homem certo chegar, aquele que e valente o bastante para escalar ate ao topo da arvore..."

 

Even if you're just an occasional air traveler, you probably know better than to wear any of those on board. Heavy perfumes can permeate the cramped aircraft interior, sickening your cabin-mates. High heels? Uncomfortable on longer flights and unusable on those inflatable emergency slides. As for shorts, once the cabin door is closed and the air conditioning is cranked all the way up, you'll be sorry.

What to wear on a plane -- or more to the point, what not to wear on a plane -- is a hot topic today for a number of reasons. Not only are we heading into the warm summer months, when air travelers commit a majority of these sartorial slip-ups, but the gap between what we should wear on a commercial flight, and what we do wear, appears to be widening.

Before the airline industry was tragically deregulated, everyone knew what to wear on a plane. People dressed in their Sunday best. Coats and ties for the men. Modest dresses for the women. And kids, who were seen but not heard, were dressed like porcelain dolls.

Now anything goes.

Oh, where is Mr. Blackwell when we need him? Here, in the meantime, are five tips on what you shouldn't wear on a plane:

Uncomfortable or dangerous shoes

Doug Lynch has a thing for high heels. He doesn't like to see them on a plane. In his opinion, pumps are problematic -- from the discomfort they cause on long flights to the potential trouble they can create in the cabin interior. "Not to mention you shouldn't wear them going down a slide," says Lynch, who works for a defense contractor in Melbourne, Florida. I second that. I'm partial to multipurpose, comfortable shoes like the pair of Ecco Xpedition shoes I recently tested. (Another bonus: they're easy to slip out of at a Transportation Security Administration screening area.)

Light colors

Darker clothes travel better, for a number of reasons, including the simple fact that a spill or stain is less likely to be noticed on a dark garment. And given the airlines' dismal record on lost luggage, you should assume you'll have to wear the same clothes tomorrow -- and maybe even the day after that. The no-lights rule is especially important for longer trips. "White and lighter colors do not work when traveling unless you can do your own laundry or trust the hotel to do it and have that sort of budget," says John Shore, who owns a public relations company in Dallas and travels frequently.

Tight-fitting pants -- or anything else that's too form-fitting

If Southwest's flight attendants were looking for a reason to stop Ebbert and all of the other pretty girls from boarding, then maybe they should have invoked their well-being. Tight clothes can be uncomfortable, and even hazardous to your health (ever heard of Deep Vein Thrombosis, also known as Economy Class Syndrome?) Kate Tyminski, a home inspector from Bluffton, South Carolina, says tight clothes are a no-no for her plane trips. "I wear loose clothing," she says. "If you are going to sit awhile on a long flight, you don't want to have anything on that is binding. The seats are already uncomfortable. Why make it worse?" Why, indeed.

Synthetic fabrics

"Nylon underwear?" says Veronica St. Claire, the chief executive of a nonprofit organization in Los Angeles. "Very bad choice. Steamed tamale time." Natural fibers like cotton are a better choice. Except for wool, maybe. I try to avoid it if at all possible, except during the winter.

Anything with a strong odor

If you wear a powerful-smelling deodorant or cologne, you might consider abstaining before boarding. You may not have any reservations about slathering the aftershave on, but the passengers sitting next to you almost certainly will. If enough of your cabin-mates complain, they may compel you to move -- possibly off the plane. "People shouldn't wear perfume or other strong fragrances," reader Meredith Weiss told me. I agree. In public places like the cabin of an aircraft, where air is re-circulated, giving yourself a pre-trip fumigation may be even more offensive than dressing immodestly.

Think comfortable and elegant. You want something relaxed and natural that you could spend a few hours or days in without losing the circulation to your limbs. At the same time, you want to look as if you belong in first class. Because crewmembers do judge their passengers by the way they dress -- just ask Ebbert and the other young women who were shown the door on their flights -- and a blazer or a nice dress can mean the difference between a pleasant flight and no flight at all.

Jim Penrose, a computer specialist from Los Angeles, says he applies the "dress for success" rule on his flights, particularly to international destinations. "It never hurts to dress nicely," he told me. "People in other countries may have a much higher sense of what is respectable and respectful, in terms of clothing."

With a little planning, we can too.

(Christopher Elliott is the ombudsman for National Geographic Traveler magazine. This column originally appeared on MSNBC.com. You can read more travel tips on his blog, elliott.org or e-mail him at celliott@ngs.org).

 

 

 

When it comes to finding love, there are certain truths that seem so irrefutable that any single person would be a fool not to follow them. Maybe you’re a firm believer that you can tell within seconds if you’re attracted to someone. Or, maybe you adhere to the idea that a first kiss says it all: If you feel fireworks, your date’s a keeper; if it bombs, cut your losses. While these romantic maxims have their fans, experts insist that these laws no longer hold true in today’s dating world. In short, many rules single people follow need a little revamping. To that end, we’ve consulted authorities in the field to bring you the most up-to-date tactics for finding someone you’ll click with.

Old rule: You can tell if you’re truly attracted to someone in three seconds
New rule: You can’t tell if you’re truly attracted to someone until you’ve had three dates
“Love at first sight” is a familiar romantic notion. And in our increasingly fast-paced world, it’s darn convenient to think you can tell if you click with someone that quickly.

	Wish lists are a classic recipe for unsuccessful dating—they don’t allow for chemistry.

But experts recommend cultivating a bit more patience, sticking to a three-date minimum to know for sure whether you’re a match (or not). The reason: People are a bundle of nerves on date #1, begin to unwind on date #2, but only by date #3 can people truly relax and maybe build some rapport. And while sparks early on are nice and all, they say nothing about someone’s long-term potential. “An important part of a compatible relationship is ensuring that each partner’s values coincide, and to learn that takes time, discussion, observation, and interpersonal interaction, not an initial impression based on superficial cues,” says James C. Piers, Ph.D., professor and program director of social work, at Hope College in Holland, MI. So, don’t write someone off — or fall head over heels — until you’ve done due diligence.

Old rule: Your mate must meet all the criteria on your “must-have list”
New rule: A “must-have list” looks great on paper, but paper won’t keep you warm at night
You can check off the attributes you want—appearance, background, education, career, salary—but unless you’re building your lover in a lab, you’re missing out. Of course, you should have standards and not settle for a two-pack-a-day smoker who doesn’t want kids when you’re allergic to smoke and eager to start a family. But settling for nothing less than perfection is unrealistic. “Wish lists are a classic recipe for unsuccessful dating,” says Fleming. “They’re too limiting and don’t allow for chemistry, which is more intangible and valuable.” Try to be flexible, especially when it comes to physical or material attributes like someone’s height, salary, or hair color. After all, just because someone’s 6’2”, blonde, or makes six figures doesn’t mean he or she will make you happy, so do yourself a favor and treat your ideal-mate wish list as just one factor in deciding who’s right for you.

Old rule: Opposites attract
New rule: Opposites distract
Dating your diametric opposite might mean the surprise of someone really new and different, lots of challenging banter and scintillating make-up sex—but sustaining a partnership with your polar opposite may ultimately prove unfulfilling. “The classic couple with nothing in common except their on-fire fights plays well in the movies, but in real life that attraction fizzles quickly,” says Alyssa Wodtke, co-author of Truth, Lies, and Online Dating: Secrets to Finding Romance on the Internet. “If you don’t like to do the same things, there will be nothing for you to do outside of the bedroom. And if you don’t want the same things for the future, what kind of future can you have?” We’re not saying you should end up with your clone, but ideally it should be someone who complements your personality (see the next rule for more details).

 

Old rule: Your date’s record collection (or DVD library, or bookshelf) mirrors yours—so you must be soul mates
New rule: You want a person, not an iPod playlist
Sometimes you meet someone and have so much in common, you know it must be love: Each of you saw

If you’re you up all night analyzing someone’s emails, perhaps this person doesn’t really want to be yours.

Phish perform at least a dozen times and know the works of David Sedaris inside out. But don’t confuse mirror-image taste with chemistry. In fact, it’s probably better if your interests don’t match up exactly. Not only does that leave room for you to expand your boundaries and dabble in something new that your partner digs, it also means you two will probably have little trouble maintaining some healthy independence. “Some of the best relationships are those where both parties have completely independent hobbies and allow for the concept of ‘his, her, and our’ time,” notes relationship coach Hu Fleming, Ph.D. So, take it as a good sign if you spend the occasional Saturday night apart—you doing dips at ballroom dancing class, your date doing the wave at an NBA game.

Old rule: Your first kiss should be a toe-curling experience
New rule: Your first kiss is inconsequential
In fairytales, an amazing first kiss leads to happily ever after—no wonder we place such importance on that primary pucker! But there are ample reasons why a first kiss from a potentially great partner can go awry (nervousness or a less-than-ideal setting) and just as many to explain why a first kiss from Mr./Ms. Wrong can feel so right (you’ve exceeded the two-drink minimum, perhaps). “A kiss can be a romantic, erotic experience with someone you find physically attractive, but a relationship will crumble without more complex attributes like shared values,” points out Piers. So rather than write someone off following a less-than-mind-blowing kiss, smile and move in slowly for smooch number two, either at that moment or on a subsequent date. Trust us, you owe it to yourselves.

 

 

Old rule: When it’s true love, you think about this person constantly
New rule: When it’s true love, thinking about this person makes you feel good
Hmm, has Willie Nelson’s “You’re Always on My Mind” become the theme song for how you feel about your sweetie? That may not be for the best. “Constantly thinking about another person isn’t love, it’s infatuation, and infatuation has no correlation with being a good match,” says Fleming. Ultimately, it’s a better gauge to assess the quality of your thoughts rather than the quantity. “If you have warm and comfortable feelings when you think about your date, that indicates a relationship built on stability, trust, and a strong ‘friendship’ factor, denoting a relationship that will more likely wear well over time,” says Piers. If, on the other hand, your relationship keeps you up all night as you analyze this person’s emails for hidden messages that reveal his or her true feelings, you may be chasing down someone who doesn’t really want to be yours.

Nina Malkin is the author of 6X: The Uncensored Confessions.

Love is a many splendored thing…and very surprising thing, too. As if you needed proof of that, here are 25 funny little facts about love. Study them, scratch your head over them, and share them with someone you fancy.

1. Men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer than those who don't.
2. The oldest known love song was written 4,000 years ago and comes from an area between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers.
3. When it comes to doing the deed early in the relationship, 78 percent of women would decline an intimate rendezvous if they had not shaved their legs or underarms.
4. Feminist women are more likely than others females to be in a romantic relationship.
5. Two-thirds of people report that they fall in love with someone they’ve known for some time vs. just met.
6. People telling their story of how they fell in love overwhelmingly believe the process is out of their control.
7. Falling in love can induce a calming effect on the body and mind and raises levels of nerve growth factor for about a year, which helps to restore the nervous system and improves the lover’s memory.
8. Love can also exert the same stress on your body as deep fear. You see the same physiological responses—pupil dilation, sweaty palms, and increased heart rate.
9. Brain scans show that people who view photos of their beloved experience an activation of the caudate—the part of the brain involving cravings.
10. The women of the Tiwi tribe in the South Pacific are married at birth.
11. The “Love Detector” service from Korean cell phone operator KTF uses technology that is supposed to analyze voice patterns to see if a lover is speaking honestly and with affection. Users later receive an analysis of the conversation delivered through text message that breaks down the amount of affection, surprise, concentration and honesty of the other speaker.
12. Eleven percent of women have gone online and done research on a person they were dating or were about to meet, versus seven percent of men.
13. Couples’ personalities converge over time to make partners more and more similar.
14. People are more likely to tilt their heads to the right when kissing instead of the left (65 percent of people go to the right!).
15. The tradition of the diamond engagement ring comes from Archduke Maximillian of Austria who, in the 15th century, gave a diamond ring to his fiancée, Mary of Burgundy.
16. Forty-three percent of women prefer their partners never sign “love” to a card unless they are ready for commitment.
17. People who are newly in love produce decreased levels of the hormone serotonin —as low as levels seen in people with obsessive-compulsive disorder. Perhaps that’s why it’s so easy to feel obsessed when you’re smitten. 
18. Philadelphia International Airport finished as the No. 1 best airport for making a love connection, according to a recent survey.
19. According to mathematical theory, we should date a dozen people before choosing a long-term partner; that provides the best chance that you’ll make a love match.
20. A man’s beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex.
21. Verona, the Italian city where Shakespeare’s play Romeo and Juliet took place, receives around 1,000 letters addressed to Juliet every Valentine’s Day.
22. When we get dumped, for a period of time we love the person who rejected us even more, says Dr. Helen Fisher of Rutgers University and author of Why We Love. The brain regions that lit up when we were in a happy union continue to be active.
23.  There’s a reason why office romances occur: The single biggest predictor of love is proximity. Familiarity breeds comfort and closeness… and romance.
24. One in five long-term love relationships began with one or both partners being involved with others.
25. OK, this one may not surprise you, but we had to share it: Having a romantic relationship makes both genders happier. The stronger the commitment, the greater the happiness!

 

Laura Schaefer is the author of Man with Farm Seeks Woman with Tractor